Offbeat

10 Travel Trends We’re So Over

Sometimes the in-and-out nature of trends is a bummer, but other times we just can’t wait to bid adieu to the uninspired. This year we’re bowing our heads in observance of former favorites (RIP human concierge service) while biding our time on others – looking at you, rainfall showers.

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1

The Airbnb Effect and Overpriced Minimalism

Airbnb has one thing totally on lock: selling guests the comfort of feeling like they’re staying at a friend’s house. Most rentals are unassuming and laid-back, and even the more design-oriented ones still have quirks that reveal a real family lives there. Hotels are trying to pilfer this atmospheric edge, swapping chandeliers and chaise lounges for IKEA-style paper lamps and repurposed bar stools, but how far is too far? Minimalist hotels are charging five-star prices while the line separating trendy and spartan gets thinner by the day. But we’re not staying at places like the Fontainebleau or the Baccarat for a low-key game night – we're expecting straight up pampering. So luxury hotels, please stay in your lane and know your own worth.

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2

Diminishing Legroom

In the battle for cheaper airfare, flyers are both winning and losing. Sure, companies like WOW Air, JetBlue, and US Airlines are dropping $99 USD flights and flash sales left and right, but at what cost to normal conveniences? Diminishing legroom means fitting more butts in more seats, but as a 5’6’ woman who has trouble comfortably fitting her knees in the existing economy setup, I feel for the those in the 6’+ club. At what point are we just lying on top of one another, sardines in a flying, oxygen-pressurized can?

RELATED: How to Travel Smart on Budget Airlines

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3

Rainfall Showers

Scrubbing conditioner out of your hair like a madman, only to find more with each swipe is a truly infuriating experience, and lurking behind the curtain of said issue is almost always a low-pressure rainfall shower. Apparently, they’re supposed to be relaxing and refreshing, but all at the expense of decent water pressure – aka the backbone of any top-notch shower. So skip the shampoo and conditioner if you’re stuck in one of these slow drippers and opt for your bathing suit and a run through the sprinklers on the hotel lawn; chances are you’ll get a more thorough wash.

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4

Bare-bones Airfare (That Ends Up Costing More)

Everyone is on the prowl for a great deal, and trust us, we love a bargain as much as the next person, but the thing about no-frills airfare is that it’s often full of loopholes and not worth the initial discount. Thanks to carry-on fees, checked baggage fees and price-gouged in-flight snacks, you could end up paying what you would have on a non-budget carrier and you’ll be sorely missing amenities like free movies, drinks, and ample legroom (no thank you!)

RELATED: 7 Ways to Avoid Bogus Travel Deals

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5

Robots and Virtual EVERYTHING

It’s 2016 and incredible new tech is coming out every day. In the last year we’ve seen driverless cars, flexible tablets, 3D-printed artificial organ prototypes, and virtual experiences of every kind. While we know this trend’s star is just now on the rise, we’re not afraid to say we’re already over robots and virtual reality in the hotel space. App concierges, mobile check-in, robotic bellhops, and super complicated tablets that control all in-room electronics are swiftly taking over; but technology be damned, sometimes, we prefer regular ol’ human interaction. Boutique hotels around the world are swapping out human concierges in favor of iPhone apps and that’s just not something we can get down with.

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6

Bunk-style Hotel Rooms

We hated college dorm rooms for a reason: those god-awful bunk beds. So now that we’re out, and finally have a bit of cash to spare on a weekend away, how is it that we’ve been duped into paying a couple hundred a night to sleep stacked on top of another grown adult? Say no to bunk beds, people! You deserve your own queen, now and always!

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7

Pillow Menus

Is it soft? Plush? Clean? Cool, I’ll sleep just fine. Pillow menus list pillows like they’re magical elixirs being sold on QVC. With names like the lullaby, sleep for success, cloud 10, and snore no more, each promises a combination of elements that will simultaneously correct your sleep posture, cure your morning headaches and reduce stress. If you know what you like, go for it, but we’re not wasting any sleep fretting over which of the 16 pillows will get us the best Zzzs.

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8

Bath Butlers/Tanning Butlers/Sleep Butlers

Call us crazy but isn’t it kind of creepy to have someone slip into your room, draw a bath, light some candles, sprinkle rose petals, and then make a quiet exit before you come back? Same goes for having a stranger slather your back with tanning oil, and having a sleep consultant pick out your pillows and pre-bed snacks and soundtrack. If that makes us old fashioned, so be it; there are some things better done on our own.

RELATED: Supposedly Romantic Travel Experiences That Just Aren't

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9

Speakeasies

Pretending to live in yesteryear is a fantasy that pulls us through each new decade. Everyone’s been to a sock hop school dance, a 70’s disco, or flapper-themed engagement party. No hard feelings – it was fun while it lasted – but speakeasies had their time and are starting to outstay their welcome. The hokey bars’ secret doors aren’t so covert, and no matter how illicit the feel, the ‘house-made libations’ aren’t worth a $16 price tag.

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10

Foraging

Let’s just clear this up: there’s a big difference between picking an apple or a pumpkin, and foraging for your salad fixins’ each night. You don’t have to be a high maintenance person to be put off by the idea of digging through dirt and bugs to find the perfect truffle. We’re all for cooking classes and learning how to plate a dish like Gordon Ramsay, but we’ll be hitting Trader Joe’s first for our fresh ingredients.